The fear of rejection can stifle us. Rejection itself is uncomfortable. It’s easier to avoid it all together. But without it, what? We live comfortable lives, only ever peering over the edge to take a look, but never getting close enough for a full view?
Don’t get me wrong - rejection hurts like hell. We all know it. But last night, I chose to get that full view. Not for anyone else, but for myself. Instead of living with eyes have shut, I wanted to live with eyes wide open, not afraid of what may be revealed to me. And boy, rejection really does get a bad rep.
I found it quite liberating. Perhaps, it is the stage of life I’m in - not really letting the details of life weigh me down as much as I used to. In fact, a few months ago, I accidentally love tapped the back of someone on the way to work and gently raised my hand in the window as if a hand up “sorry about that” gesture would suffice. I mean it’s these things that really make me laugh. Two years ago, I would have never responded that way.
I’m a lover of life - I love how it changes. I love how we’re constantly evolving as people, as individuals. All just trying to make sense of the world and our place in it.
Rejection hurts. So what? We gain some clarity, perhaps a bit of direction and definitely freedom from the fear of rejection itself. If we let the fear dwell, it will dwell. It will stay there. It may tell us lies. It will get comfortable. And we may subconsciously begin to let it rule us and our decisions about the things we really want clarity on.
Do you know what brings clarity? Honesty. Do you know what comes from being honest? Sometimes, rejection.
I woke up this morning ready to write. I haven’t had that feeling in a very long time. I’ve almost had to force myself to practice writing. To practice doing what I love to do. I do get reminded of this lesson here and there — living breeds experiences. Elementary thought some may say. I don’t mean eating, working, sleeping. I mean, getting out and doing things in the world. Building relationships. Meeting strangers. Feeling things without filters.
It’s hard to put a finger on this idea exactly but all to say, sometimes to feel something, we have to be willing to put our fears aside. I did that yesterday and I woke up feeling great. Like new life was breathed into me. Rejection hurts but it hurts good - it’s exhilarating. I don’t think it’s something we should shy away from but we should welcome and appreciate it. If we yearn to bring clarity to a part of life, we must be honest. We must be open and willing to accept life in one of its truest forms.
The feeling that comes after rejection is sharp. I mean, I’m gonna be honest, it’s not great. It’s not great. But it’s a real reminder that we’re alive. And being alive feels damn good. So dig deep, feel all of it and remain open to what comes next.
Alex